Yep, you read that right. This year I have decided to forgo the usual new year resolutions. I decided to revolt the system when I started making a mental list of what I wanted to accomplish in 2008. Save more, spend less, exercise more, eat less… the usual suspects. I realized that I say those things every year, and mean it at the time, but by mid-February (if I’m lucky), I have already blown my budget by adding several pricey pairs of spring shoes to my wardrobe, and am willing to seriously maim someone for a chunk of chocolate cake.
The thing is that I really do want to make changes for the better. Who doesn’t? It’s just that I’m not one of those super disciplined people that can stick to their agenda like glue. I consider myself a sensual person, taking pleasure in things that appeal to each sense. Unfortunately, the one sense that suffers from this principle is common sense, especially when I deprive myself of something that I think I’m never going to have again because I gave it up as a resolution. The end result is that I overdo it the next time in spite of what that little voice in my head is saying.
So, this year I decided to buck the system and follow that tried and true philosophy that is the staple of many different self-help groups, “take it one day at a time“. No more stressing myself out by avoiding that new pair of shoes or that gooey piece of cake. Nor am I going to force myself to pinch every penny or hightail it to the gym. Been there, tried that - for years - and was still saying the same things when the next year rolled around. This year, there’s no more guilt.
By taking each day as it comes, I start with a clean slate. If I screwed up the day before, hey, it’s gone. If I don’t do everything on my agenda today, then as long as I have prioritized and made it through the most important things, I did well. No more kicking myself because I didn’t get it all done. Same goes for my shopping and eating. Anything goes. With the thought gone of never having a specific thing again, I no longer obsess over the verboten item. However this time around, I do have a little chat with myself to see if I really need or want the item in question. If I find I can’t live without it, it’s in. If I decide that I can wait until another time, I let it go. Surprisingly, I find that by taking those few minutes to think it out, nine times out of ten, I go without. And I’m fine with that.
It’s the same thing with saving money and exercising. How about tossing a few bucks into the rainy day kitty or going out for that walk - just for today? There’s always that underlying thought that if I really want to, I can splurge or laze tomorrow. And you know what? This attitude adjustment seems to be working. Yes, it’s still only the beginning of the new year, but I’m not preoccupied with this stuff these days, and as a result, I’m actually eating healthy and not feeling resentful (or deprived) because I know if I really want something, I can have it. I also walk daily because I know I don’t have to if I don’t feel like it. I even saved some cash by realizing that I didn’t need those hot-pink stiletto pumps. So what if my recently sprained left ankle did a lot to help win that argument? The point is I didn’t buy them.
I’m not sure how long this new way of life will last, but so far, it hasn’t been the usual struggle. I feel good at the start of each new day and even better when it ends. Tackling things as they come, instead of fighting with rules I imposed upon myself at the beginning of a new year, seems to agree with me. I think I can do this one day at a time thing - but that’s my thought today. Ask me again tomorrow.
©2008 BA Dolny
